I have a perfect example. Back in 1998, before the turn of the century I worked at a restaurant with an openly gay co-worker named Tim. He was the first gay friend I ever had (knowingly anyway). He was a really nice guy. Funny, endearing, and always upbeat. I never gave much thought to his sexual preference because to me personally it did not matter. But little did I know how much it did to others. When you work with someone 8-10 hours a day 5 to 6 days a week you begin to develop a bond. You get to really know someone and I was fortunate enough to get to know Tim. We'd catch a beer after work every once and a while and he really opened up to me. I had no idea what it was like to grow up gay and this poor kid had to live in a world of secrecy his whole life. He lived in fear because of his orientation and the backlash he would get if others knew his secret. He told me he didn't start living his life as an openly gay man until after high school when he moved away from his town. I remember one particular evening when I was going to meet some of my friends for some beers after I got out of work. I invited Tim and he joined us. I was so embarrassed. When my friends realized Tim was obviously gay they treated him differently. Not mean but they did not make him feel welcomed, quite the opposite. I could read it on Tim's face that he was uncomfortable because of how they were receiving him. He left early and my one friend say "How can you hang out with a gay guy?" My response was simple. "What difference does it make if he's gay. Does that make him any different just because he's gay? He is a person that has feelings just like anybody else." I let them know I didn't think it was cool how they treated him. Tim later confided in me that he was HIV positive. I lost touch with him after I moved. I found out that he had died after I moved to Orlando, after the turn of the century. It was still very taboo at the time to be out. Fast forward to 2014 and kids are coming out in middle school. And what happened to my friends who were anti-gay? They became parents. And guess what (because I have asked)? If they found out that their kids where gay they wouldn't love them any less. They would accept it. Funny how times and ideas can change.
What Taylor suggests when he says"to live differently, you have to think differently" is that in order for change to be effectuated, as distinct individuals we have the ability to alter or change our mindset in a positive manner in order to impact society positively as a whole. My wife has had an estranged relationship with her mother. Her parents divorced because of her mother's infidelity and this caused great strain in their relationship. As a parent one of the things you are responsible for is to provide your children with a caring and nurturing environment. As a result of her mother's decisions my wife's world was turned upside down and it impacted her through into adulthood. The relationship between her and her mother became that not of mother daughter but of enemy, enemy. When we became pregnant with our son I recall my wife on many occasions pronounce that her relationship with our son would never be as damaged as her and her mothers. She vowed to "break the cycle" of negativity. She made the conscious decision to "live differently and think differently". She promised to make certain she never hurt our son mentally the way she was. And she has lived by that vow. She is an amazing mother.
Taylor quotes Kegan when he says "we need to resist our tendencies to make right or true that which is merely familiar and wrong or false that which is strange". What does he mean? I believe what Kegan is referring to at its core is the development of character. Our character develops at an early age and can be influenced by both people and events in our lives. Experiences can dictate how we develop our values. For instance if you grow up in an environment that is cold and void of compassion chances are as you grow up it will be difficult for you to be an empathetic or compassionate. When I was little my family did not have a lot of extra money. I played in a youth club soccer league and all of the other children's parents bought them name brand soccer cleats. Also every one's cleats were black. My parents could only afford to buy me cleats from Wal-Mart. And they were white so they stuck out like a sore thumb. I used to be so embarrassed to be the only kid on the team with different colored cheap shoes. They were so cheap that the cleats actually started to fall of after a while. My teammates never made me feel bad about this but my father knew it bothered me. This led to my first lesson in humility. My father explained to me why they could only afford $20 shoes and not $60. If I got the $60 pair of shoes what would the family eat? He taught me that the shoes didn't make me who I was as a player. My play spoke for me on the field whether I was wearing $20 shoes or was barefoot. I learned a valuable lesson. As I develop into a leadership role with my organization I plan on remaining humble, compassionate, and trustworthy. My values shall be a reflection of my character.
As I reflect on the notion of whether or not it would be possible for our society to eschew the elements of pop culture that degrades people I thought of examples of such behavior.
- Rap music that degrades or belittles women and objectifies their existence.
- Hate groups that target others based on ethnicity, sexual orientation, or religion.
- War, and the role of nations and governments.
Organizational change efforts require a planned strategy to bring about organizational change. It typically involves a collaborative approach with an emphasis on ways to improve performance and quality. It is concerned with the interrelationships of divisions, groups, and subsystems. It is based on the scientific approach to increase effectiveness. If individuals cannot adopt these concepts then the destructive behavior will drive out the constructive and collaborative effort that is necessitated for organizational change to be implemented.
I found this to be one of the more difficult exercises I have completed to date. It challenged my critical thinking skills more so than any other assignment I have had to date. I must have watched this video ten times! The main concept I will take away from this exercise is that I have the power to make change... to make a difference. If I practice what I preach it may have an infectious effect on those I might lead and that type of result can be beneficial to organizational development.
Some questions I have as a result of this exercise are:
- How can I prepare to stay ahead of the curve as it relates to organizational development? Is it possible to be in a leadership role and not lose touch with your team members?
- If I could make a change in my organization today what would it be?
- How could I create a harmonious environment within my organization that other companies would want to emulate? What more could be done to increase productivity?
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