Sunday, September 13, 2015

A632.5.5.RB_DiazBrian



Values are shaped by our environments.  Our backgrounds, experiences, and cultures dictate which values we will hold dearest to us.  Protected values should be independent of consequences, insensitive to quantity, and applied to acts (Hoch & Kunreuther, 2001).  Our protected values will differ, however the strength of their convictions should be equal.  If there are values that we hold in deep belief we should honor them and stay true to their ideas, positions, or notions.  My three protected values are freedom, kindness, and respect. 

It is my belief that we should all be free.  Free to think as we want, to act as we want, and to make our own decisions about how to live our lives.  Freedom however can be a double-edged sword.  Was James Holmes free to walk into that Aurora movie theater and take the lives of those 12 people?  Are students free to use social media to bully their classmates?  Should mothers be free to have the right to refuse their children medical care because it goes against their religious beliefs?  These are all valid questions.  My freedom, the freedom that I hold steadfastly is different than these examples.  To me, the thought of freedom is an inherent device used as a tool to make the world better.  Steve Jobs was free to imagine and in doing so… he changed the world.  Plato and Socrates were free to share their knowledge which influenced science, politics, and literature.  The actions of the few should not negate the totality of the good propagated by the masses.  

I believe we should be free to love whoever we want regardless of race, gender, or religious beliefs.  Growing up, I never knew anyone that was openly gay until I was about 20.  I worked with this kid at a restaurant and he was openly gay.  Working with him and getting to know him was one of the greatest learning experiences of my life.  It taught me that just because someone is gay does not make them bad.  It doesn’t make them evil.  It just makes them different.  We actually got to be good friends and would go for drinks together after work.  He would tell me the how painful it was for him growing up gay.  How he had to hide it from everyone and that living a lie was hard.  He explained to me how his lifestyle cost him relationships with his family.  He was a tortured soul.  After some time, he confided in me he was HIV positive.  My heart broke for him.  In the late 90’s it was basically a death sentence.  He was always so upbeat though… Thinking about him brings a smile to my face.  He once asked me if I would be willing to give him a ride to get medicine because no one else knew he had AIDS.  I felt honored that he trusted me the way he did.  I think sometimes we forget to remember that we are all human.  We all have feelings.  Freedom in our society has come at a great price.  It was the reason for our civil war.  It was the reason for so much unrest in the 60’s.  We fought then and we continue to fight today for our freedoms.  We should never stop fighting for what we believe in if those beliefs make the world better and cause no harm to others.

 

I grew up in a very traditional Hispanic family.  My mother stayed home and did all of the cooking, cleaning, and laundry.  My father worked and when he got paid he would give my mom his paycheck.  She in turn would pay all the bills, buy the groceries, and make sure we had what we needed.  She would give my dad enough money each week for him to buy cigarettes and put gas in his car.  To this day, they are still in love, (they get on each others nerves more than anything but it’s cute) almost 40 years later.  What I learned from them was to be kind.  Be kind to others regardless of whether you think they deserve it or not.  I try to live my life by the values my parents instilled in me.  I never have understood why some people choose to be mean to others.  It is very disheartening.  I go out of my way to be kind to others.  Especially strangers.  Why shouldn’t I?  Especially when you don’t know someone is when you should be the kindest.  It’s the first impression they will have of you.  Also you don’t know enough about a stranger to determine whether they deserve to be treated unkindly so why do it?  I make the conscious decision to be kind to everyone.  I love the smile it brings to people’s faces when just the simplest gesture of kindness makes their day.  Every day is a new day and we should strive to make it better, not only for ourselves but for everyone we encounter.  Being kind to others is not a value I’m willing to make a trade-off on.  


At a young age I was taught to respect my elders.  My best friend growing up was Italian.  I was able to learn just how important in his culture respect was.  I loved the fact that I was able to learn in my childhood from different cultures because it gave me perspective on life.  I loved to watch the interaction that older people had with each other.  The way they spoke to one another, how they greeted one other.  I found it fascinating.  The lessons that I learned I am trying to teach my son.  We went to an event a few months back and members of the local fire and police departments were there.  I think it’s great for children to look up to athletes or to actors but these are the men and women who actually put their lives on the line day in and day out.  I told my son that these people were heroes, kind of like the ones he knows from his cartoons but only in real life.  I want him to have respect for the job these individuals choose to do.  They deserve it.  Just as do his teachers, grandma and grandpa, and mommy and daddy.  I feel like if more parents were to instill this value the less difficult it would be to raise good hearted, well-meaning children.  If someone wants to be a great leader, respect is a quality they need to possess.  Williams (2013) wrote “Respect must play the most important role in any personal or working relationship. One of our most important statements at our company, Fishbowl, is, ‘I’ve got your back.’ This single phrase carries all of the Non-Negotiables with it” (para. 4).  Respect plays a big role in my life.  I give it to everyone I know just I do with kindness.  I have no right or authority to be disrespectful to others.  It’s just not how I live my life.

 
Kindness and respect come to me as natural protected values.  Freedom became one as I got older.  I’ve learned not to judge others on how they look or who they date.  I opened up my mind.  It wasn’t always the case but I had some valuable teaching lessons in my life that have shaped how I perceive things.  I believe strongly in my convictions.  I believe in treating others right, fairly, and without prejudice.  Being kind and respectful are products of my behavior.  In the past I’ve worked for organizations that didn’t live up to these values and I left.  For me, money is not the number one driving force in my life.  Happiness is.  If I can be happy and help other to be happy, I feel I will have served my purpose in life.  I want my peers to feel that I was respectful and kind.  If that can be my legacy that will be just fine by me.

Hoch, S. J., & Kunreuther, H. C. (2005). Wharton on making decisions. Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons Inc.

Williams, D. (2013). Great Leaders Know Respect Is The Keystone Of A Successful Business. Retrieved from http://www.forbes.com/sites/davidkwilliams/2013/05/29/great-leaders-know-respect-is-the-keystone-of-a-successful-business/  


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